The Basics: is this grief?

Grief is often misunderstood. We tend to associate it with death—but it can stem from many types of loss. A relationship ending, a job falling through, a move to a new city, or even the realization that life isn’t going the way you imagined—these can all bring grief to the surface.

So, how do you know if what you're feeling is grief?

Let’s start with the basics.

Grief Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All

Grief doesn’t always look like crying. It might feel like numbness. Or irritability. Or exhaustion. You might feel spaced out during conversations, find yourself withdrawing socially, or wonder why the little things suddenly feel so overwhelming.

Everyone experiences grief differently, and there is no “correct” timeline.

Common Signs of Grief:

  • Feeling a deep sense of sadness or emptiness

  • Struggling to concentrate or stay motivated

  • Mood swings or increased irritability

  • Changes in sleep or appetite

  • A sense of disbelief or confusion

  • Pulling away from others

  • Physical symptoms like fatigue, headaches, or a heavy chest

Grief can be quiet and internal. It can also show up in bursts of unexpected emotion—waves that come and go without warning.

Loss Takes Many Forms

While the death of a loved one is a profound trigger for grief, it isn’t the only one. You might be grieving:

  • The loss of a relationship or friendship

  • A miscarriage or infertility experience

  • A shift in identity (becoming a parent, leaving a job, aging)

  • Unmet expectations or “what could have been”

  • Watching someone you love suffer

  • Changes in your health or ability

If you're feeling disoriented after a life change, you might be grieving—even if you didn’t label it that way.

Why It Matters to Name It

When we name what we’re going through, we give ourselves permission to feel. Naming your experience as grief doesn’t mean you’re weak—it means you’re human. Grief deserves care, not comparison or criticism.

So... Is This Grief?

If you’ve read this far and something inside you said, “Yes… this sounds like me,” then it very well might be.

The good news is: you don’t have to go through it alone. Therapy can offer a compassionate, steady space to process your grief—however it’s showing up.

You’re Not Broken—You’re Grieving

Grief isn’t something we fix. It’s something we learn to carry differently over time. If you're wondering whether what you're feeling is grief, that's already an invitation to slow down, check in with yourself, and seek support.

We're here when you're ready.

Want to talk through what you're feeling? Reach out to schedule a session or learn more about our grief counseling services.

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How to know it’s time to see a therapist